Practical Guide to Becoming a Calmer, Nicer, Happier Parent
Parenting is one of the most rewarding roles in life, but it can also be incredibly challenging. It can be difficult to stay calm and patient when faced with tantrums, crying, and endless questions. All too often, parents can become overwhelmed and end up responding in a way that they later regret.
Anger and impatience are normal and understandable responses to difficult situations. However, when they become the norm, it can be detrimental to both you and your child. Fortunately, there are tools and tips to help parents stay calm, practice patience, and respond in a constructive way.
Here are a few practical, easy tips to help you become a calmer, nicer, and happier parent.
1. Take Time for Yourself
It may sound counterintuitive, but it’s important to take time for yourself, even if it’s just 10 minutes every day. Being a parent can be emotionally, mentally, and physically draining. Taking a break gives you time to process your stress and makes it easier to stay calm and patient with your children. Schedule a few minutes a day for yourself, even if it’s just sitting in the car, doing yoga, or reading a book.
2. Acknowledge Your Feelings
It can be tempting to push away negative emotions when we become overwhelmed. However, it’s important to acknowledge our feelings. It helps us process our emotions and makes it easier to respond to our children in a constructive way. So, take a few moments to recognize how you’re feeling before responding to your child.
3. Practice Self-Compassion
Nobody is perfect and it’s impossible to maintain perfect composure all the time. It’s important to practice self-compassion and forgive yourself for your mistakes. Remind yourself that you are doing the best you can in a difficult situation.
4. Choose Your Words Wisely
It’s easy to slip into negative communication when we are feeling overwhelmed. However, it’s important to choose your words carefully. Speak to your child in a respectful and encouraging manner. Don’t use phrases that put your child down, such as “Why can’t you do it right?” Instead, focus on the behavior that needs to be changed and explain why it’s important.
5. Make Sure Your Child Is Heard
Your child’s feelings and opinions are just as important as yours. Acknowledge and validate their feelings, even if you don’t necessarily agree with them. This will help your child feel heard and understood, which can help them stay calm.
6. Take a Break
It can be incredibly helpful to take a break if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Let your child know that you need a few moments to calm down and that you will talk when you’re both feeling better. Taking a break gives you time to process your emotions and respond in a more reasoned and constructive way.
7. Focus on Solutions
It can be easy to get stuck in a cycle of criticism and punishment. Instead, it’s important to focus on solutions. Ask your child how they can fix the situation or if there is anything they need from you to help them do so. This encourages your child to be more independent and teaches them how to solve their own problems.
8. Take a Deep Breath
Taking a few deep breaths can help you stay calm and collected. It can be helpful to take a deep breath before responding to your child. This can help you stay focused and think before you act.
9. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment and recognizing your thoughts and emotions without judgment. Practicing mindfulness can help you stay present and aware of your feelings, and it can help you maintain your composure in difficult situations.
10. Reach Out for Help
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or need advice, don’t hesitate to reach out to family, friends, or professionals. Support networks can be incredibly helpful and provide valuable guidance.
Becoming a calmer, nicer, and happier parent takes